


What Almost Could Have Been

by rivaihanz



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 20:21:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29938902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rivaihanz/pseuds/rivaihanz
Summary: Sneaking out parties, late night walks, fresh tea. Perfect nights do exist, don't they?
Relationships: Armin Arlert/Annie Leonhart, Levi Ackerman/Hange Zoë
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	What Almost Could Have Been

**Author's Note:**

> Had to get this out of my mind.

The spotless bedroom window becomes tinted with a faint orange light as the sun sets outside. Tired from its daily job, it finally takes a rest, mixing the colors of bright yellow, pale pink, and faded orange. The sky, barely visible behind the huge trees in the forest, offers a sunset scene that’s one for the canvas and paint. 

Hange steps in front of the gilded mirror placed by the window. The mirror has been a statement piece in the bedroom since they moved in. Its ornate frame is gilded with carvings that they are not familiar with, colored a muted shade of gold that does not really shine or glitter when light meets it. 

The mirror sends back a clear reflection of them, and they do a quick survey from head to toe. 

Hange’s eyes travel from their hair, which is usually greasy from the lack of showers and baths, now clean and carrying a fresh scent of flowery shampoo. Let down, their brown hair highlights their eyes which is almost of the same shade. Their eyes continue downwards, checking the brand-new velvet coat that hugs their body’s upper half, to the black pants that they reserve for formal occasions, down to the newly polished boots that are ragged around the edges from use. 

Giving their reflection one last look, Hange ticks off a white ball of fluff on her coat when the door suddenly opens. Barging in is Levi, dressed in his usual immaculately clean attire, probably ironed from top to bottom, inside and out. Hange turns around for him to see them fully dressed. Levi looks at her silently, downing the contents of his small glass. He cracks a small smile, something that rarely comes to his face even before. 

“Apparently, four-eyes, you can look like a decent human being,” he says as he walks over, turning Hange back to face the mirror. Wrapping his arms around their eyes, he peeks behind Hange’s silhouette. 

Giving a breath of relief, Hange says, “We look great together,” as they angle their head, trying to catch a better view of the two of them. 

Levi lets out a dry chuckle. “And you only realize that now, huh? I thought you were supposed to be wisest here.” 

Hange turns around, a thousand words ready to spout, “Well, it’s not like we had the time to ponder over our reflection. Most of the time we were out in our gear killing Titans and doing missions-”   
Levi, whose hand is still wrapped lightly around their waist, stops them. “I was kidding, Hange.” 

“Your humor is really the driest I have ever encountered in my life and that’s saying something because I’ve been friends with Erwin,” Hange teases. 

The name of their lost comrade, though, brought a pause to the light mood of the afternoon. Levi puts his glass, now empty, on the table beside the bed. 

“Well, we have to go. Annie will throw a fit if we come late to their party. It’s their first child after all,” Levi says, reaching out his hand. Hange reaches out theirs and they step out of the room in awkward silence. 

Turning to check the man’s face, Hange scrunches up their nose, conscious of the fact that what they said may have tainted the mood. “Are you upset, shorty?” 

Levi chuckles. “No. But it does ring a hollow bell inside when we say their name.” 

Hange nods. “I miss them, too.” 

They reach the carriage waiting for them outside their house in the forest, the path now darkening as the sun sets even further. They both get inside, and the carriage starts. Levi reaches out to take Hange’s hand, stroking it lightly. 

“You’re here, though.”

Giving him a soft smile, Hange leans their head on Levi’s shoulder as the man murmurs, “That’s enough for me.” 

The two have been together for a long time now, from the day they started serving the Survey Corps to this stage in their life. They saw the worst of what the world can offer, and now the best peace they can ever have. They saw the next stages of their life together, and now that they are living it, though the names of their dead comrades still hit differently, they know they find peace in each other’s presence. 

The carriage rattles on silently, the view changing from the vast forest to the city. Annie and Armin decided to live near the capital for Armin to easily do their duties as the commander. Not that there are any more risky excursions out there. It all worked out in the end, though the deaths still hang heavily in the air.   
Hange lifts their head when they notice the carriage halting. A knock from outside signals them they’re outside the house of the celebrating couple. As they step on the cobble-stoned road, Levi links his hand with theirs. Hange gives them a faint smile, knowing Levi has now become more secluded, preferring the peaceful isolation brought by the forest. 

Stepping inside the humble home of the couple, Hange gives them a bright smile as Annie and Armine come near. Annie’s stomach, which is now slightly swollen, showing the early of pregnancy, is covered protectively by her hand. 

“Congratulations, Annie, Armin! It must have been nice when you first heard the news,” greets Hange, their smile still bright.

Armin’s cheeks develop a slight blush. “Well, we’re very excited about it.” 

“I’m sure you both are,” Levi says, offering a rare smile of his as congratulations to the couple. 

“Well, we won’t keep you. The food is there, the floor’s also now open for dancing, thanks to Jean and Sasha,” Armin says, chuckling. 

Levi and Hange make their way through the small crowd of people, meeting the familiar faces of Pieck, her arms linked with Porco’s, who’s downing a glass of wine. Hange smiles at them, a low rumble of a laugh escapes from them as Gabi topples Porco, his suit now drenched red from the wine. 

“Still chaotic as ever, I guess,” they say to Levi, who, as usual, just watches the people having fun. 

“Oi, shorty, don’t tell me you’re already bored. We just got here,” Hange tells them. 

“No, just still stunned the world we are in now is so different from the chaos of before.” 

Hange nods in understanding, but their attention then diverts to the platter of food carried by a waiter. They grab a couple, stuffing one into their mouth. 

The music speeds up as Jean and Sasha, who has now taken over the dance floor, sweat themselves out as they dance to the rhythm. 

“You know, my parents taught me to dance,” Hange says. 

Levi crosses his arms. “My parents didn’t, and I know where this is going four-eyes.” 

“Aww, come one, Levi, it’s a party,” Hange says, raising their hands in protest. 

Levi shakes his head, still adamant about being seen dancing. He does not particularly care of what other people think, but he’d rather be the only audience when Hange dances their life out on the floor. 

Failing to convince Levi to dance, Hange turns their attention to the food, constantly stuffing Levi’s hand with whatever they get their hands on. Levi just eats them without complaint, until he burps out loud. He meets Hange’s eyes, the latter’s sparkling from the fun and vibrancy of the night, laughter definitely playing in their brown orbs. 

The party has gone even wilder, the music now very upbeat and the guests, almost all of them drunk in the wine, have gone out to dance. Hange turns to Levi. 

“Are you bored?” 

“If you want to stay, we will,” he says, though it’s apparent parties aren’t his thing. 

Knowing the man for years, Hange knows better. They tug at his arm, whispering, “Let’s go home, I’m sure they won’t miss us.” 

The two sneak out the side door, evading the carriage that sent them here. 

“Are you up for a walk, Levi?” Hange asks, their eyes shining still from the excitement of sneaking out a party and what lies ahead for the rest of the night. 

With a soft smile, Levi tugs them closer, and walks in step with them. The night has gone deeper, the sun now replaced with the half-moon up in the sky. Not many people walk by, almost all of them ready to retire for the night and paid no heed to the couple walking together silently in their calm and soft bubble. 

“Aren’t you regretting your decision to stay in the forest? You could have built a successful tea shop here in the capital,” Hange asks. 

“The forest is much more peaceful. Besides, how would you grow and study plants if we were in the city?” Levi questions, thoughtful of Hange’s interests that makes their cheeks heat, though not visible in the dim lighting of the streets. 

“Thank you,” Hange says, their voice softly mixing with the cool wind. 

Levi turns to look at their face. “For what?” 

“For putting both our interests in mind. It still surprises me that we managed to be here after all we’ve been through,” Hange says, their eyes now a shade dull because of sadness. 

Levi wraps his arm tighter around them. “Like I’ve said, we rely on each other silently. It’s enough to get by.” 

Hange nods. 

“It’s more than enough, actually.” 

The rest of the walk was in silence. This was the thing that both of them appreciated. There was often no need for words. They needed only the other’s presence and an eye contact, and the calm settled in. It may be the fact that they joined the Survey Corps together, spending all their years almost side by side, but Hange and Levi have built a connection with each other that surpasses any relationship they have with others. 

There was no need for any declaration or affirmation. As long as they felt it in silent agreement, they both knew they needed each other. 

They reach their home in the forest in the dark of the night. The wind whistles against its tree friends, greeting them in a friendly manner. 

Hange wraps their coat around them tighter. 

“Do you remember when I asked you to live with me? To be honest, I never thought that dream would even be realized.” 

Levi opens the door, the wood creaking against the floor. 

“Oi, four-eyes, stop being so sad. Come inside now, I’ll make tea.”   
Inside, Levi heats up the kettle, stirring precious tea leaves inside one of his numerous jars. 

“Hange.” 

Hange looks up at them. “Hmm?” 

“Don’t you think we should be focusing on the future rather than pondering the past?” Levi asks. 

Nodding, Hange replies, “You’re right. We should move on day by day, closer to the healing that we all need. But, Levi, there will always be setbacks, days and nights when we wish we can see them again. Talk to them again, hear their loud laughter again. I think it’s okay to ponder the past once in a while.” 

The two stay silent for awhile, 

Hange cuts the silence, saying, “But you’re right, we really should look forward to what’s in store in the future,” they give a soft smile, watching Levi pour two cups of black tea. He walks over, placing the cups on the counter. Reaching over to Hange, he grabs their hand, pulling them closer. 

Whispering in their ear, “I wanted to dance. But alone with you.” 

Chuckling, Hange says, “But there’s no music.” 

“Do we even need that?” 

In the kitchen, by the counter, the two sway awkwardly in silence. Hange laughs it off with a loud chuckle. 

“You definitely don’t know how to dance,” they say, their eyes brimming with laughter. 

They continue, though, indulging in the weird, awkward dance they have. It always manages to fit in and make sense. They both always manage to make sense together. Inching closer, Hange rests their head on Hange’s shoulder. Closing their eyes, they softly say, “You know these moments should be done while we have our eyes closed.” 

“What does that have to do with anything?” 

“They say you feel more when you close your eyes.” 

Hange looks at Levi. “Spin me around with your eyes closed. We’ll take this moment as a way to celebrate the fact we’re looking forward to the future more.” 

Levi, though taken aback by the strange request, obeys. Lifting his hand, he meets Hange’s eyes. Brown to grey, both in a happy state. He spins her around as he closes his eyes. And for some reason, his heart ached. Maybe because he did feel more at that moment, or maybe because of something else. 

Silence ensued, but his lips gave way to a soft smile. Opening his eyes, his grey eyes meet the unoccupied space of the kitchen. His eyes scan the room, his eyes landing on the counter, the two cups of fresh, black tea left on their own. Sighing, he runs his fingers through his hair. 

“Four-eyes.” 

No one answers to his call. Nodding to himself, he closes his eyes and tilts his head up. Nights like this come to him often, especially when it nears his birthday. Hange Zoë, the person who’s almost the exact opposite of him, left more space in his space than he would have liked. They could have a better future, but they both ignored it for something worth fighting for. But times like this make him question if this, now, was worth it? When he’s left alone, wallowing in the pain and regrets of the past. 

Sighing, Levi whispers back to the silent wind, “How do I move closer to the future when I’ll always be shackled to what we almost had?”


End file.
